Ladies keep asking me what to do when they are madly in love with a guy but he isn’t into them. Some said they heard God clearly the guy is the one but he is not showing interest neither is he proposing. The peak is the one whose “boo” is seriously engaged yet she keeps hoping he would one day hear God, end the damned relationship he is already into and propose marriage to her.

Yes, it’s possible to hear God ahead of the guy that he is the one. It is possible to be crazy about a guy yet he ain’t noticing and it is possible he is very much engaged to someone else, yet you know beyond every shadow of doubt, he is the one, what should you do?

This is where most ladies mess things up. Some would get really impatient and start doing everything in their power to make the guy notice them. Some would out rightly propose to the guy by telling him to his face he is God’s will for her! Some would get jealous of his fiancee and try everything within their power to break the relationship and “claim” their “husbands” while some would forward the good news to all their friends who will erroneously address the “innocent” guy as her fiance.

The acid test of God’s will is peace. If you truly heard God, you will be at peace and at rest. You won’t be impatient; jumping up and down and doing everything humanly possible to get the guy’s attention.

You can’t force a man to notice you. If he is not attracted to you, he is simply not and there is nothing you can do about that.

Desperation turns men off. A man likes to notice a lady and give her the chase! He values what he sweat to get not what is thrown at him.

So what do you do after receiving the “revelation”? You can only pray that God should reveal the same thing to him while facing your business, no more, no less! If it is truly God who revealed that guy to you as your husband, not your flesh, not the devil, not your emotion, not his good looks, money or fame, the same God will also reveal it to him, God is not the author of confusion my sister! You can’t help God to pick a life partner for you. Let him do His job! Yours is to practice 1 Cor 13:4-8 while waiting!

My mentor had known about 2 and half years her husband was the one before he came to propose, in fact, he was already engaged to someone else. 13 different men came to propose to her but she said NO while patiently waiting for a man who obviously had no interest in her. She is a naturally beautiful woman, brilliant, charismatic, a virgin, came from the upper middle class family, spirit filled yet the man didn’t notice neither was she parading herself cheaply around him. Eventually, his relationship didn’t work out. He sought God’s face and God revealed my mentor to him as his wife. It was later in their courtship she shared all God told her about him to him. They are happily married today.

Impatience is a sign you didn’t hear God in the first place. God leads, the devil pushes! If you have this crazy urge to rush things, you obviously heard your flesh not God. True love waits and God is love. If you are really sure it is God’s will, you will patiently WAIT for Him to work things out and not jump from pillar to post trying to match-make yourself . 1 Cor 13 vs 4 says, “Love is PATIENT…” If you are not patient, it is not God’s will my dear, relax, get a glass of cold water and go to sleep. May the Lord grant you understanding. God bless you. Cheers!
© Seun Oladele, 2017; reposted, 2019.

#For all the single and married men:

In this part of the world, when a marriage is succeeding, the society praises and celebrates the husband alone. And when the marriage fails, it’s the wife who bears all the blame and shame alone. But that’s wrong. What if the man was the cause of the problem or divorce?

I think it’s high time people did the right thing. Praise or blame should be apportioned accordingly, not according to one’s gender. In Africa, the husband most times, if not all the time, is right, and the wife most times is wrong. Hmmmm, Africans!

This narrative must change. Spouses should be blamed accordingly. Blame who should be blamed and praise who should be praised. That’s what the Bible teaches— justice and fairness.

It’s no more news that marriages experience conflicts sometimes. These conflicts could be spiritual, financial, sexual, material, familial or attitudinal in nature. The issue isn’t whether or not spouses experience conflicts, but how they resolve them? While it’s expected for both spouses to seek for a resolution during conflicts, because that’s the standard practice, but sometimes, that doesn’t happen. In such a situation, what then should be done?

As the head of the family, I advise that the man should show greater maturity by initiating the move for a resolution even if he is right. Nothing breaks up a marriage like a scenario whereby two spouses are trying to prove their innocence in a case or justify their actions or inactions. Remember, two wrongs never make a right.

As husbands, our position in the family is a call to a higher life of marital operations. Honestly, being a true head requires a lot of love, understanding, patience, tolerance, forgiveness and overlooking. If as a man, you are the type who likes to prove a point in all conflicts, you won’t be able to be that true head you’re called to be. A head means a LEADER, not a LORD.

Most times in marriage, winning isn’t about winning one’s spouse in all arguments. It’s about playing the fool by overlooking many things. While both spouses are expected to overlook each other’s imperfections, the husband should do more of that because he is the leader.

Sadly, African men are not raised to be leaders in marriage but lords. They’re only raised to be bosses and not friends. They are raised to be camp commandants and not partners. They are raised to be in full “control” of the spouse and not to be best friend of the wife. Little wonder why most men when offended will be hardened to the point that the wife may have to summon the elders in the village to beg him. That isn’t what leaders do; it’s what lords do. As a husband, must you always report your wife to your own family or hers? Can’t you deal with the issues yourself? Please don’t get me wrong on this: I am not saying that some cases should not be escalated if need be. No. I am talking about the trivial issues. Things that are not complex in nature. Please deal with them. Period!

Honestly, many marriages would have been saved from breaking up, if only the husbands in those marriages had acted like true leaders. But unfortunately, many acted as lords.

Dear husbands, it’s alright to be firm as the leader in your marriage. But don’t be to the extreme. That leadership style robs marriage of its sweetness, fun, happiness, bliss and fulfillment. Marriage is not a prison because your wife isn’t a prisoner. Marriage is not bondage because your wife isn’t a slave. Marriage is fun because you and your wife are expected to be best of friends. Therefore, today, I invite all the husbands to become leaders and not lords in their marriage. In my marriage, I am a leader, not a lord. Many thanks for reading, commenting, liking and sharing.

See you at the top!

Your friend,

Coach Joshua

Photo credits: Facebook News Feed

You claim to be afraid of commitment because of one thing, one thing like that but wait a minute, how come you are not afraid of the danger of Sexual immorality?

Its one thing to be afraid of commitment as a result of some terrible past experiences and decide to stay away from relationships totally. May be, some women don show you pepper or the fear of repeating what your Dad did to your mum or the fear of having to leave every other babe to cleave to one woman forever ( that’s God’s command anyway) or may be its financial constraint or fear of what to expect in marriage.

Its another thing to keep sleeping with any free babe who is willing and ready to give free sex and later dump them when you get tired, yet claiming to be afraid of commitment when she gets serious. Who you dey deceive?

Bros, You don commit taytay.

Listen, the moment you sleep with that babe, you don commit o. You are committed to her Spirit and Soul. You are one with her. Whatever she carries you carry and that is stronger than the physical commitment.

There is a spiritual commitment with all the babes you have laid down except you submit to Christ to Cleanse you. Better wake up and stop deceiving ya self. Stop placing value on the physical more than the Spiritual. Let God work in you both to will and to do of His good pleasure.

His good pleasure therefore is, “The MAN and his WIFE are both naked and not ashamed.” Not the boy and girl. Run fast to the one who can heal your Spirit, soul and Body. In Christ you are safe. He will heal your fears and settle you. Good evening.

Written By: Ayoola Omolara Pmh

Women are full of authority, everything about them is authority in reality and in disguise. Talk of the way they are wired scientifically by God and everything that concerns them please don’t joke with them. They are specially, wonderfully and fearfully made. Our mothers has a great impact in our lives, it started from the womb. I must confess I give it to all women, you are unique.

The saying is very true that “behind a successful man, there is a woman” though not all women. Not just a woman, there are woman but not all of them are virtuous. For a man to do exploits please don’t joke with them. If a man miss a praying mother, it is very risky to miss a praying wife.

Am not been cultural here but if you see it that way it’s also good. You can say that again that “my success is not tied to a woman” that’s the thinking of a low minds. You better seat down and recognize the authority of God in their lives.

The scenario in the book of Proverb 31:10-31 says it all. That passage is a must read for all vision minded and responsible guys. I encourage responsible ladies too to read it and start preparing for such a great task.

Barrack Obama, the former US president and his wife Michelle entered into a mall, she saw her former boyfriend mopping the floor, barrack joked about it that thank God she married a president, but her response was powerful, she said “the man mopping the floor would have been the president” automatically she was telling barrack that I got you there. That’s a woman of influence, a woman of purpose and Barrack don’t take her for granted he valued her so much.

Guys, to know them you don’t go about with scanners. You attracts your likes. A responsible guy will attract a responsible lady. No two ways to it.

In a marriage where the wife grabs her husband’s head in the morning rain prayers on him I tell you that man will do exploits. On the contrary, in marriage where the wife rain curses on her husband am telling you, the guy is going down the drain very soon. We men misses a lot of things due to our ego, our ego is for conquering in the outside world and not to oppress our wife. Please use it wisely. Women are very strong 💪 and rugged. Till tommorow I still praise a virtuous, courageous and wonderful woman in my late mother. Thank God for a great replacement in my wife.

Guys start working on it. Ladies please be a woman your husband can be proud of. You have authority, you are strong 💪, you are awesome!

A more impactful and responsible relationship is possible.

You know I love you ❤️

© Olajide Olawale Opeyemi
Relationship, Marriage and Spiritual Success Coach.

Photo credit: Facebook

It’s common place in many marriages that when the husbands’ chips are low, many wives lose respect for their husbands.

Honestly, and without mincing words, women who are doing that aren’t virtuous wives. I make bold to say that such wives are ignorant, insensitive and callous.

However, may God bless all the wives who though their husbands are going through financial difficulty, yet still respect them wholeheartedly. God bless them really good. You are wives in the truest sense of it.

Wives, here is the bombshell:

The headship of the husband in his marriage has nothing to do with his financial buoyancy. It’s a divine appointment that is unconnected to what he has or doesn’t have. So wives, submission to your husband should not disappear if his finances go down or when he loses them completely.

The virtuous wife stays with her husband, encourages him and prays with him and gives him peace of mind during his downtime.

Madam, once again, what type of wife are you?

Coach Joshua

Dear husband, dear friend,

Now that God is helping you financially and materially, why do you maltreat, neglect or even abandon your wife that stood by you all these years when you didn’t have anything?

How dare you look at her in the face and tell her that she isn’t in your class anymore? How could you say such a thing to her?

Have you forgotten her prayers, her advice, her moral support, her encouragement, her deprivation so that both of you can succeed in your marriage and life?

Have you forgotten the many times she had to go borrow food stuff so that the family can eat when you were so helpless to anything?

Have you forgotten the few or many times she had to pay the house rent, the children school fees, feed the home singlehandedly because you suffered a set back on your job, business, or ministry?

In your financial downtime, she had some men who wanted her to have extra marital affairs with them. But because she loves you so dearly, she turned down all those financial favours and stayed with you without compromising her marital vows.

In your financial downtime, unlike some crazy wives out there, she gave you peace of mind. She never bothered one bit and never complained about your financial challenge to you or to anybody else. Rather, she supported you all the way.

Now that you’re up and doing financially, no that you’re very successful. Now that you’re very rich. Now that you’re a celebrated business man. Now that you’re a very successful professional. Why do you maltreat her? Why do you call her all kinds of unprintable names? Why do you neglect her and her children? Why do you now sleep alone in the master bedroom while she sleeps in one other room? Why are you seeking to divorce her now because she doesn’t have kids for you yet or doesn’t have male children? Why do you now keep mistresses, side chicks, baby mamas, slay queens? Why do you now cheat on her?

Dear husband, I am not a women’s advocate. I only stand by the truth. If you are doing all that to your wife, know that it’s very unfair, callous, and wicked. A good husband never treats his wife this way. Please change and treat her well. Because what God has joined together, let no “change of levels” put asunder.

Coach Joshua has said his own. Let him that has ears, take heed to this great advice.

However…

#I celebrate all the husbands who despite having changed levels financially have never changed for bad or worse towards their wives. God bless you, keep you alive and preserve all his blessings upon your lives. You’re husbands in the truest sense of it. You rock!

Many thanks for reading, commenting, liking and sharing.

See you at the top!

Your friend,

Coach Joshua

Photo credits: Facebook News Feed

#For all the singles:

As a single, if your aim is to seduce or date married people, then you must be crazy. Because only crazy people do such things.

When someone is married, it means the cessation of any form of amorous affair with them. Dating a married person is circumventing God’s order about marriage. The Bible calls such act ADULTERY.

As a single, dating a married person is unacceptable and wrong. That act shows how insensitive, selfish, callous or wicked you are. No matter the pleasure one could derive from it, adultery can never be justified for any reason.

Adultery, also referred to as cheating, does more harm than good to the married persons who cheated. The consequences of cheating are enormous and nefarious. They usually pack up marriages, shatter lives and leave unpleasant memories that haunt for a lifetime.

Dear singles, dating married persons don’t make you powerful, but weak. A truly strong single chases another single and makes them their own. Dating married persons is unwise.

I am a ladies’ man. My good looks, baritone voice, attractive physique, charisma, dynamism and intelligence have given me some opportunities to have both single and married ladies hanging around me in ecstasy, with some of them wanting me to date them. But since I fear God, and that I am not crazy and insensitive, I never ever contemplated dating a married woman for once, let alone doing it. Not even with some financial and material benefits attached to them.

Dear singles, please leave the married persons alone. No matter how bad or terrible their marriages may be, you dating them is not solving any already existing marital challenges, but compounding or creating more problems for them. Adultery creates more problems.

As a matter of fact, many married persons are the ones who date singles. I know that, but today’s post is not about that situation, but about the singles whose mission is date married persons. Therefore is say to all the singles out there: I am a married person, don’t you understand? Say no to adultery. Many thanks for reading, commenting, liking and sharing

See you at the top!

Your friend,

Coach Joshua

Photo credits: Facebook News Feed

Marry who you love.

Marry your friend or someone you can be friendly with.

If there is no love in it, there is no God in it.

Marry who you love and don’t marry out of pity and sympathy.

Never marry anyone that feels that they deserve someone better.

Those that believe or feels they are too good for you, never marry.

Don’t encourage anyone to Marry you, it is an invitation to failure.

Never marry to manage. Marriage is for lovers not managers.

Marry lover of God with God’s first mentality.

Marry someone with similar vision,focus and passion.

My Dearest Heavenly Father please turn around, our troubled finances, stigmas, relationships troubles, Lack in our life’s into blessings🙏

All those looking forward, towards us falling in life, grant them Long life Mighty FATHER, shame and disappoint them🙏, as you grace and decorate us with your heavenly blessings🙏

Lead us into our greatness Mighty Father🙏

Contineu to strengthen and bless your assigned angels in our life’s, with every good things they deserves🙏

Father help us, empower us, to be a blessing to others as well🙏

Connect us lord with our life partners, may our paths cross each other lord.

Help us lord 🙏 to be at the right place, with the right people and at the right time!!!!!

Lord remove from us every filthy garments of pain, shame, marital delay, struggles in life, disappointment, marital crisis, childlessness in marriage and unemployment.

Put on us lord garments of love, peace, joy, marital breakthrough, and advancements in life just as you did to your servant Joseph in the Bible.

Lord, as the year is coming to an end, so shall all our predicaments, trouble, fears and worries of life come to an end.

Lord May you make all those laughing at us lord come to dance and celebrate with us….

Thank you for answered prayers. AMEN

I am a 34- year- old married woman with two kids. I have been married for 7 years now. My husband is a very caring man and the type of man every woman dreams of, but the issue is that I am not faithful to him. I have been sleeping with my father since age 18. My mother got to know of this affair 4 years later; she took ill later and died shortly after. I blamed my mothers death on my actions and promised to stay away from my father. But I could not resist returning to my fathers bed. After my mothers death, our bond even grew stronger and my husband thinks I am spending more time with my dad because of the death of my mother.

Tales, my husband thinks my two kids are his, but they are my fathers children. The children look like my dad but because I look like my dad also, no one suspects anything. My affair with my father ended my past relationships because I was never sexually satisfied with my es-boyfriends. I do not want to my husband because he is a good man and I love him very much, but I am unable to curtail the sexual bond between my dad and I. Now, I want to make things right without hurting neither my husband nor father. How do I disclose this to my husband? Please help me.”